Sunday, October 28, 2007

Rockies Fans Have a Lot to Learn

Dear "Fans" Of the Colorado Rockies,

We know your team is "new" and the fans of the team or even "newer" (meaning 90% of the "fans" appeared after the Rockies made the playoffs), so I decided as a well-seasoned fan to let you in on a few things.

The towels, they're really freaking annoying. Even Dustin Pedroia thinks so. And don't think that by waving them you're distracting him in any way. They're just annoying. The only time this was cool was when Myron Cope came up with the idea in 1975.

Unless you want to be called trash, trashy or some iteration of garbage, don't show up to a game in a trash can. And while I'm at it...(I couldn't find a picture for this next one) - what kind of parents (other than trashy ones) let their young daughter show up to a game with a bulls-eye around her face with a sign that says "Hit it Here?" Isn't this some sort of child abuse? Should social services be called in? They showed this poor girl on tv multiple times last night and I was annoyed by it every time.

This is perhaps the most disturbing image I've seen of the entire World Series. A grown man in a Teletubby costume? Not acceptable. So wrong, on so many levels, I don't even know that I should go there. Dear Rockies fans, just believe me there is something very wrong with this.

Now, when your team is in the World Series - even if they're losing - you cheer your hearts out the ENTIRE game. You cheer so loud and so long that you won't have a voice for the next two weeks. You let that team know that even if they're losing you love and support them and you'll "get-em-next-time" you DO NOT sit there silent, wiping your nose with your annoying towel.

These were perhaps the only acceptable Rockies fans I saw, take a lesson from these kids! They're cute and they're showing their team spirit without being annoying, trashy, abusive or just plain scary.

I know you don't have much to go by, but I hope I was able to help you out. May you continue to cheer for this team, in a more appropriate manner, for many years to come!


*All photos courtesy of


someonewhoisdefinitelynoterinbiscoe said...

Yeah, what about that idiot dressed as the Jolly Green Giant, or broccoli, or whatever the hell he's supposed to be, standing next to the teletubbie? What does that have to do with the Colorado Rockies? Also, you'd think they'd make those stupid towels either purple or black. Any color other than white. Are they trying to surrender.

BTW, here's the conversation between my mother and I about bullseye girl:

Auntsusiebiscoemum - "'Hit one here!?' With that little girl's face in the middle!? Oh, that's just not right!"

Me - "Calm down, it's no big deal, they're only baby teeth."

Anonymous said...

Hey lady...look, I'm 100% dirt dog...hardcore. I also live in Denver. Yes, most of these fans were on the bandwagon...yes, the towels were, uh, annoying. But this is nothing new, and this happens in every stadium...even Fenway, I've seen it in person. Just calm down, okay? We're a peaceful people here in Colorado...maybe you should take that stick out of your a$$ and follow our lead.

Soxy Lady said...

Dear "Anonmymous" Dirt Bag, errr Dog...

The mood of my entire blog is a bit snarky, lighten up.